Why did she lie?

Hi,

I am a 21 year old guy at university in the UK. I have been talking to this Filipina girl for the past year or so. I have never met her so its a purely online relationship as she lives in the Philippines. Things became a bit serious and we decided to form a relationship (this is very recently). We have talked on the phone, skype etc. We talk very regularly and I can honestly say I do love her. But a few days ago I got a message from her in which she said she lied about her age and virginity. Originally she had told me she was 18 and was not a virgin. And now she told me shes 16 and a virgin.

Now, in the UK a 21 year old dating a 16 year old is a frowned upon thing, for obvious reasons. So now I am super confused as to why she would bring this up now, and not before. Why she lied about her age and her virginity status. Can anyone shine some light on this? The age is a bit of a concern for me now its a big jump. She is mature for her age which is why i never really questioned it. Im not sure what to do now, I do trust her, just not sure why she lied. And confused about whether I should maintain a relationship with her despite the BIG age gap.
PS. Im not a pedo

She probably lied because she knows that people would be reluctant to talk to her if she had revealed her true age initially, now you have gained her trust she has opened up to you. If I was in your shoes I would not consider taking the relationship any further at this stage, if you went to see her for example you could find yourself ending up in jail being accused of under age sex or something similar, so just watch your step. Keep talking to her by all means, she will be eighteen before you know it.

I like the statement of being non pedo quite amusing

She maybe wanted to bridge that gap in your mind. Then had second thoughts. Remember she is young.

Cheers for the advice, yeah logistically its not possible for me to travel to see her in the near future regardless. She will turn 17 this year and by the time i graduate she will be 18. Yeah i mean that was my biggest concern. I do love the girl which is difficult for me to state considering I have not physically met her.

Yep. Not long before she is 18.

Nothing compared to the age gap between me and Mrs Ash.

Yeah thats true, I mean due to the long distance thing thrust is of paramount importance. So I feel like she has broken that a little. She has had countless opportunities to express this, I just hope shes not lying about anything else.

Easily done at that age.

Thanks, I guess you're right. Maybe I'm being overly paranoid

I would let this one go, I actually think its good she eventually came clean.

Remain vigilant though and do not start sending her money unless for a Birthday or some other special occasion.

Could be the start of a long lasting relationship, you never know.

I have had to conclude that people generally dont know what the word means and cant be bothered to look it up

ha ha--in my case 23 years between us

i see nothing wrong in a 21 y o guy online dating a 16 year old girl. she is most likely years ahead of you in real life.

I am sure I don't need to remind you that the age of consent in the Philippines is 18 - merely being alone in a room with a girl under 18 who is not a relative is a serious offence - and obviously you need to be a bit careful with any Skype chats or photos that she sends you.

I concur that she has just decided to tell the truth.

Young Filipinas can be very "forward" in what they wear depending entirely on their mother. I have a 13 year old neice who dressses like "jail bait" because her mother is stage struck and wants her to be a model - she on the other hand dreams simply of being an air hostess, which I fancy is a much better idea.

yeah i have remained vigilant - she has never actually asked me for any money. I think she understands that I am in no predicament to send money anyway, with student life and all.

well--er--yep.

Yeah, now that I am aware of that I will be careful not to overstep any legal issues LOL, tbh i think shes worth it naa she doesnt dress provocatively shes actually very conservative, even with her pictures on fb and instagram etc. Hopefully it can extend into something long lasting, but still early days.

just stay in touch with her online--but dont go visiting till shes of legal age. not that you will be able to as a student. i'm sure she will be worth the wait

yeah lol doubt ill be able to afford it until i get a job anyway

Could you elaborate? I mean I do have some concerns, but the issues which have occurred in terms of her family have been kept to only emotional support. She hasnt asked for any monetary favours.

I don't think its anything untoward, probably inexperienced in relationships and wanted display a presence of being more worldly than she actually is. If you like her then there's nothing wrong in continuing the conversions. Sounds like the relationship will continue online for a good while so your not putting yourself at any risk by visiting her.