The story is always that they live a simple life and only want a little in life, once a foreigner is on the hook the level of ambition often changes and you suddenly find as you get deeper into the relationship that the expectations grow rapidly, I am speaking from personal experience of 19 years, I've been supporting my family for 19 years, it started out as something simple until the wants and needs grew and grew, Filipino's are no different to anyone else they're not going to settle for simplicity when there is clearly something better on the table. And she's married and there is no divorce in the Philippines so as PhilPensioner has pointed out that makes you immediately open to blackmail if you get physically involved with the lady, and physically involved does not mean much more than to have been in the same room as her with no one else around as a chaperone, you don't have to have been in physical contact. While it is possible as John Surry suggests that she's given an old phone to a friend who is working overseas it would imply that her facebook account was still signed in on said phone, I have a friend who continually pops up at Carstairs, he gets the train to Glasgow when he gets pops up there I can tell he probably got the sleeper, facebook leaks a lot of information and a lot of people don't realise just how much it leaks even when they can see these kind of status messages on other people's feeds. Always remember that the simplest explanation is most often the correct explanation, Occams razor: the best explanation of an observation makes the fewest assumptions, if she pops up in Saudi it's probably because she was on a plane transiting Saudi. Malcolm stated that I was in IT, well I am in a sense, I'm a software engineer a software architect, I write business systems my IQ is not the highest in my peer group but I've done well enough in life, I apply basic rules of logic to my life and even then I lost a business, a home and spent 15 years in debt to the government as a result of getting involved with the Philippines 19 years ago, it is an endevour that is not for the faint of heart. Just as a matter of interest where in the UK are you based yourself?
Having had a few relationships there in the Philippines over a 12yr period and made many of the mistakes that you have been warned about, (John and Bigmac are giving you good advice along with a few others here) Well I met a married woman she was 30yrs my junior and was chasing me more than the other way around, her cousin married to a Lawyer said this will be no problem to have her marriage annulled and this can be done in one year, 4yrs and 4 court hearings later it still has not been resolved, the lawyers fee was P150K this was half price at mates rates, he has had 80% of this from me and I can see no light at the end of this tunnel? True the Husband could bring a case against her for Adultery but this rarely ever happens? in most cases the estranged Husband is already shacked up with another woman and has more children with her, I know of many Foreigners in the exact same position as myself and know of none where this has caused them a problem? so I would not get overly concerned about that, however better that you had chosen a woman that was single. You say that you have a high IQ this may well be true of your Thinking Head, but what about that other head that all us men have, The Dancing Head this has a direct connection to a mans testicles and the IQ of this is around half that of a Thinking Head? Btw your new found partner is highly likely to have a rather low IQ but your Dancing Head is not quite in the position to be able to assess this? so many Filipinos from a poor working class background have malnourished brains living off a diet of 95% Rice and only around 5% protein, added to that the mainstream education system leaves a lot to be desired and all about singing dancing and clapping hands,,, however these Pinays from a working class background do make excellent partners they are just a world apart from their western counterparts these are just Fat Fecking Fire Breathing Dragons that want to wear the trousers in the house, only one problem with the Pinays for as good as they are in most respects you are unlikely to find one that can sit down with you and furnish you with any stimulating intelligent conversation, she will have only been educated to the standard of a 10yr back in UK, your Dancing Head cannot see this at the moment? A very high proportion of working class Filipinos are deeply in debt, often they get into this situation by borrowing P10K to throw a big lavish Birthday Party for their Child, but this is never enough so they end up spending P12K, now and again these people feel the need to show off even though it gets them deep in Debt. It is highly unlikely your Lady is earning P500 a day this would be a top wage for a skilled man on a building site most getting between 350 and 400 a day I know this as I just finished building a house there about a year ago, likely your lady is telling you a white lie her PRIDE will not allow her to tell you she makes between 80 and and 120 pesos a day and eats the leftover food that does not sell that day, if she had been making anything like the 500 she says she has her neighbours would all be copying her. I would question her Son attending college at the age of 27yrs again her pride will not allow her to tell you he has some dead end job, likely just another white lie on her part, she will be ashamed to tell you the true nature of her living circumstances? Get yourself over there for a holiday let your Dancing Head have a fling to have a nice honeymoon with this lady, in time your Thinking Head will take control over your other head and only then start to make decisions over your future together. As for myself my relationship with this woman 30yrs my junior has just about fizzled out even though we have a 6yr old son together it has not worked for us, this often happens where there is a large age gap between the couple, also I am now living for the long term back in Scotland.
Hi goku1, Your situation is worrying: as has been written , best for you to slow down and go to visit her before you think about marriage or a future.
Title I have many concerns unfortunately. 1st post “fallen deeply in love with her” If my youngest(27) came to me and told me he was going to drive to Hartlepool to declare his undying love for someone he had never met I would tell him he is barking mad.let alone fly to the Philippines slow down, visit retreat decide
My wife (Filipina) says you are risking your life if you are not careful by cohabitating with a married women. It doesn’t matter how long they have been separated, it is against the law and you could end up in jail. Yes, people do live with separated partners but it is either in secret, or with an agreement between all parties, or sometimes, even with a signed agreement through a solicitor (because it’s cheaper than annul). The wife recommends taking the last option because the husband may be fine about it today but tomorrow is always a different story, and the slightest thing can make things go tits up. Being a foreigner is even more reason to be cautious. the wife says she has seen problems a few times, especially with foreigners. The husband wants money, gets jealous because of her new life, or just wants some sort of revenge for their own past. (Even if the husband has a new partner himself, he just doesn’t want his ex to be happy !)
Yes @GJD223 is absolutely right... crab mentality rules here. The problems often occur when the Red Horse / Tanduay /Drugs come out and the guys are getting smashed... and I mean totally **** faced... So what are you going to do about that foreigner messing with your "wife"... shall we pay him a visit ... you want to kill him??? You need to meet her a long way away from where she lives, probably Manilla and just keep it very quiet.
which is the main reason i will never go there. ex husbands typically want a million peso to co-operate. getting someone hit costs 200 quid.
4000 prisoners crammed into this hell hole one of the members on here spent several years in a hotel like that.
Thanks for all your replies. It doesn't matter now. She told me she's been offered a job in Taiwan. Long story short. Have sent her a message to say its over. As for her husband, I wouldn't have been worried about him, I'm a big bloke with a lot of mental health issues that I told her about. One of them us psychosis. I've recently been taken advantage of too often as I wear my heart on my sleeve too much. Have decided that I'd anyone does that again, then I'm going to rip their heads off. So I'd have probably either put her husband in hospital or killed him. Can't remember who asked where I live, But its in kent
A lot of us in this forum have visited the Philippines many times and are now married to Filipinas with children making a family in the UK too. The Philippines is full of pretty, fun-loving Filipinas who are very serious when it comes to family life. Don't be put off if it doesn't work out with one lady. Take a trip (or more) over there and you will see for yourself how lovely the women are and you may see how hard working they are too. Pop back in here if you need any further help. Best of luck in whatever you decide on.
Whilst I have no proof that she has actually got a job offer from abroad, my suspicious old self thinks that her kano is arriving soon, or already there, and she doesn't need the distraction you may cause. I just hope that you haven't sent any money before the actual meet. As mentioned on another post, if I am wrong in my assumption, I stand to be corrected and will apologise.
