Hmm....to think about it I can start planning. What part of Philippines is the best for me to visit ?
If you will stop by Manila, it is highly recommeded that you have an Intramuros tour. The tour will give you enough background about the history of the Philippines. Just make sure that Carlos Celdran will be your tour guide. Try it! It'll be fun!
It depends on what you want to do when you are there, Tygrrysek. My favourite area was Palawan because of it's ruggedness and scuba diving. Filipinos are very friendly wherever you go but you do have to watch out for the right girl. There are ladies of the night and there are ladies who would not do that. The Philippines is not too expensive for a single man to visit.
If you are saying about the night clubs and party girls that's not my cup of tea The girl I want must be nice and, warm, tender and gentle, caring and friendly And most important - full of feelings Sincere feelings not the fake ones. And I don't worry about the cost of the trip, just about the time.
I saw an interesting article on the news yesterday regarding internet dating, some Professor on there reckons you are three times more likely to divorce if you meet your wife online, probably a little bit of truth in it but not much.
... and with one in three relationships (U.S.) starting on the internet, that's a bit worrying. http://www.statisticbrain.com/online-dating-statistics/ http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/06/03/online-dating-marriage/2377961/
Yes. I do belive in that. Everything is in your hands really and people are not treating internet serious. It's like "easy come, easy go". Like a spoiled child with the toy. Second thing is that western culture is highly ruled by consumerism. People treat relationships like business contracts. Calculating what gives them most of the profits. They can only take but giving something from themselves is really hard for them. Everybody thinks only about himself. I personally don't belive that they know what the love is and know a meaning of this word. They use it because they are feed "love" from every book and every movie in the tv. It's like a fashion. Good to be seen with it, and good to speak with friends about it. But they don't know what's it mean. That's why i chosen totally different culture from far east. I really don't fit to this part of the world.
And also remember that to a lot of Filipinas you are a means to their ends, important to remember that.
Hmm.......sorry but I can't understand the meaning of that sentence. I don't have a clue how to translate it to my language.
What Timmers said is very true, Tygrrysek Poverty causes many problems and you will be seen as a "catch" to many Filipinas. Wherever you go there, you will see ladies/girls smiling at you and you may be approached by people who say they know a girl in their village who is single. With this in mind, I think it is best to visit the Philippines and get to know what is happening there and to plan to not get involved too quickly. I remember going there in the 80's when I was a much younger man and I was in a bar or club feeling like all my birthdays had come at once. The amount of beautiful women there can be overwhelming at times particularly when you have had a few drinks. Luckily, I had already worked in many countries so I was not "green". I walked through a department store in Makati and had never seen so many beautiful faces with warm smiles in one place before. It was breath-taking. So, take your time and if you meet anyone who even hints at you helping her financially, walk on as there will be many "good Filipinas" who would be too ashamed to ask for money even though their families could use some extra help. "Softly, softly, catchee monkey" I downloaded this years ago....... ========================================================================= Love and Romance Filipino Style Introduction Not only are the Filipino men very handsome and romantic but the Filipina girls or Filipina women are world known for their stunning beauty. And some foreign women have finally figured that out the Filipino men can be quite a catch. Filipinas girls, are not only beautiful women but a delight to be around because of the famous Filipina disposition and personality. Some, actually many who marry these Filipina beauties, swear they make the best wives in the world, not only beautiful, but loyal, loving and faithful past death. From living here so long that has been my experience too. And, don’t worry if you are older or overweight, like half the population of the western world. Both women and men here have the highest respect for age and weight is a plus to some here. It is a status symbol. If you are overweight, you virtually lose twenty percent of your weight when you step on Philippine soil. Age is respected. Consider yourself lucky to not be a kid anymore. The Filipinas will, hard to believe, but true. Young guys are welcome too. May/September Romance Most Filipinas like a man with a little, or even a lot of, meat on his bones. And the men here are attracted to "heavy" women, a sign of health to them, especially in provincial areas. In Asian cultures generally, being overweight is a sign of substance and wealth. When I told my Filipina wife, Ani, I was going to lose a little around the middle, she said, What for?" Love and romance is serious business with these conservative Filipino women, whether they are from a city like Manila or the countryside, the province. Romance and eventual marriage is a preoccupation, especially for young Filipina girls in the province. But your average Filipina is cautious about how she conducts herself, especially in the provinces, where every one knows everything about everyone. The Filipina, How She Behaves in Her Culture, a "True Filipina." In the Philippines, if a man wants to be taken seriously by a woman, he has to visit the latter's family and introduce himself formally to the parents of the girl. It is rather inappropriate to court a woman and formalize the relationship without informing the parents of the girl. It is always expected that the guy must show his face to the girl's family. Filipino women, Filipinas, are expected to be pakipot (playing hard to get) because it is seen as an appropriate behaviour in a courtship dance. It is also one way by which the Filipina will be able to measure the sincerity of her admirer. Love, Romance, Marriage and Virginity Virginity is sacred in this Catholic country. Women are taught there virginity is a jewel. Filipino men are not interested in marrying a non virgin. I, thought I am not sure I ever dated a virgin until I came here, understand why. I am sorry if that sounds strange or unforgiving. But in this culture the woman is responsible to not only herself but her family for protecting that virginity. She may not even be forgiven if she is raped. I know this is not fair. But that is the way it is and the Filipina girls know it. Many are badly hurt by men who lie and promise marriage, with no intention of ever marrying them. But they are forewarned in no uncertain terms most often. They know the risk they are taking by trusting a man who want to have sex before marriage. Much of my research on this subject comes from a book written by Dra. Lordes Lopez, the psychopathology of the Filipino. My experience bears out everything she says in her landmark book. The Philippines seem like a neighborhood rather than a country. Of a married or single woman strays, everyone knows it. Filipino men are reluctant to marry a non-virgin even if they are the one who took the virginity! If they could get them to break the rules maybe someone else can too. These young Filipina girls who stray, are called "soft noses," in some areas. The culture and the family lets the girl know it is her responsibility to keep her virginity as soon as they are old enough to understand what virginity is, not only in words by example. They understand is is not the man's responsibility. They are well aware that most men are animals, sexually. As a man, I must agree with that. To steal one of Jay Leno's jokes, "Research doctors at Johns Hopkins University just this week, took out a man's heart and replaced it with heart of a pig." Then Jay asks, "Know what happened?" He punches with, "Nothing." "Everything was just the same." So Filipina women know it is their responsibility to guard their virginity. If they don't, they often pay a serious emotional and social price. If you are involved with a girl who is not a virgin in this culture, you are running the risk of getting involved with an emotionally unstable woman. She has broken the cultural mores, disobeyed her parents others. She may have other problems too, but maybe not. I feel, why take the risk? You may feel differently with good cause. Meeting a Filipina Meeting a woman through someone else is a good idea. If you meet an older man or woman who has some status, be direct and say, "I am looking for a wife.’’ They will not be shocked, I assure you, but delighted, if you are truly a gentleman. Filipino men often wanted to take me home to meet their sisters and cousins. A couple of time I went. I was not allowed to be with the Filipina unsupervised and understood that from the beginning. And if you don't like the sister or cousin, he will find another relative to introduce you to around the corner. He will want to keep you in the family, but only if you can understand and relate to the culture. If not, problems may arise. The Filipinos and Filipinas are communal, interdependent not independent. When you marry one you marry the family at least the mother and the father, the siblings too usually. That is trite, indeed, but true. Be sure and read the Family section of the culture page and see if you can deal with what is expected, almost required, a right of the Filipino family whose child is married to a man, foreign or local. If you can't let it be know from the start of your relationship with your Filipina. If she is a "true Filipina," the relationship may not develop. If it does she may not be happy in it, but you will never know. "Pen pal" listings, E-mail pals, Introduction services are other ways to meet Filipinas and Filipinos. I did not meet my wife through one of these services. I took the time to come here and find one who was not interested in marrying a foreigner. I am glad I did. But I do know many who have great success and many who had serious failures who used these services. These services are illegal to own and operate in the Philippines, though not in any other countries I know about. With e-mail, text pals and the Internet it is easy to meet girls here and establish relationships without an illegal broker. If you join one of these services, though you may feel it is the only way for you to go, do consider another avenue. A trip here does not cost much. And marriage can be for a life time, or should be. There is no divorce her The girls get into these services free. The men must pay. You may be writing to several women. They may be writing to dozens of men. Getting involved in any romantic relationship is always fraught with pitfalls. But for some, it is worth the risk, they feel. In a relationship built in a text-based environment, without visual clues, the people involved tend to fill in the blanks with desired attributes of the other person that often turn out to be inaccurate. The person you are writing to may only have the qualities you see in here because you bestowed them on her in your mind. If you are reading this after having already established a romantic relationship with a Filipina, I am sure you are saying, "My Filipina is different." A romantic relationship with a Filipino or Filipina has a better chance of success if you come over and immerse yourself in the culture. And it is important to meet a woman’s or man's family because the family is so important to him or her. And maybe the family will always will be more important than you. There is an Asia saying, that is accepted in the Philippines, "You can get another wife or husband but not another mother or father." Filipino children are committed to their parents who usually went through a lot to raise them. There desire is to make their parents life easier. If you are capable and refuse to help support her family who may need it because of the very hard economic situation here, she may not say anything, but she will neither respect you nor understand. As said, but it can't be said enough, Filipinos and Filipinas are interdependent people, not dependent, like in western cultures. They are so by choice and because their cultural needs. Cultural Difference / Net Relationships Crossing cultures is hazardous, and using a text-based environment to become emotionally attached to someone increases the chances of a failed relationship. But there is no guarantee any way you do it. Common sense is your best guide to finding a Filipina bride, a Filipina wife for life who is happy and you can make happier. A wise man said: "It's best to limit your internet relationships with those whom you have already met personally. Selecting your partner in life is one of the most serious decisions you will ever make. So if you have that in mind, consider a trip here before getting too involved. You may think it expensive. But it could be the best expenditure of your time and money you ever make. And there is no better place for a vacation that this beautiful tropical country. These services that bring together Filipinas and foreigners for the purpose of marriage are just not the ideal way. My advice is do not get involved with them at all. Letter from DR, slightly edited, to a LinP3 guest who just has a "Filipina problem." I sympathize with those who have had relationship problems. I have recently gone through the move others are about to make. I have learn so much and continue to earn more everyday. First, let me say that without a doubt, you can find the kind of girl you are looking for. There is an essentially unlimited pool of women who would love to date you here. And many, many are what you're looking for, but they are the ones you will have to put the effort into get them. They will NOT approach you and they usually are not on the internet. (But a few are.) Those on the internet are the ones who are MOST likely to be what you don't want...the MTV/Cosmo influenced girls. But, since I have recently moved here and learned A LOT fast. I have a few suggestions: First, avoid Manila. The girls there are far less likely to have the values you seek. Or they will be province girls who have come to "the big city" in the belief that the streets are paved with gold and quickly become desperate and, as such, do desperate things. I have travelled much of the country and find Cebu city to be the best for a new-comer (at least until you become grounded) especially if you are an American. Cebu is probably the most American friendly place in the country. (Not to mention the most progressive.) Second, BEWARE. Be wary of the girls, be aware of anyone who offers to help you (foreigners included). There are MANY, MANY scams and scam artists. I moved here after dating a girl for 8 months over the internet and phone, visited for 6 weeks, then moved here. A week after moving here (after selling my house in the US, etc.) she confesses to me that she got engaged to another American since my last visit... I NEVER would have thought her capable of such a thing, but I was wrong. I have always considered myself a good judge of character, but I have found that Filipinos are VERY good liars. Also, the culture here allows people to justify almost anything in the name of "survival". And many have a very broad definition of "survival". (Essentially anything that means they get money is helping them to "survive".) So, when it comes to getting married, take things slow. Many girls will try to rush you into marriage, but don't allow them to. If they are rushing, there is probably a reason. Also, don't forget the prenuptial agreement...and if she has a probably with signing one, I GUARANTEE you DO NOT want too marry her! Third, never forget that you are a "foreigner". Being a "foreigner" means that you are expected to pay a higher price than a Filipino and this is pretty much an accepted practice by all Filipinos...don't expect other Filipinos to sympathize with you just because you are the victim of a double standard). This double standard is an accepted practice. Be a foreigner also means that if the **** ever hits the fan, you are the "odd-man-out". And this includes your future in-laws. Blood runs thicker than water. If their is an issue with the family, don't be surprised when your wife sides with her family over you, her husband. Now, having written all of this, I don't want to be all negative. I was just surprised that no one else had given you this helpful advice. I think there are many great things about living here, the good women tops among them. But, I thought you could also benefit from some of my hard-learned lessons. DR Conservative Sexual Behaviour, Philippines Editor's Note: Published on page A23 of the Mar. 21, 2005 issue of the Philippine Daily Inquirer A THIRD of the students in the University of the Philippines in Diliman, (UP) Quezon City, have engaged in sexual activity on campus, according to a 2004 university study. (A more recent study that was just released, one that reflects the general population, not just the UP Diliman population says that one third of the men and only one sixth of the women, between 15yo and 37 yo have engaged in pre-marital sex. We hope to post that study soon. It was also doee by UP. Noted October 2007.) But before conservatives -- and perverts -- react, "sexual activity" refers not only to doing it all-the-way but also to French kissing, petting or necking, masturbation, oral, coital or anal sex. Thirty-three percent, or 126 of 359 respondents, admitted to having sexual activity on campus, according to a study by the Communication Research Department of the UP College of Mass Communication. The majority, or 65 percent of the respondents, said they had not engaged in any sexual activity on campus in the past three months prior to the survey conducted during the last week of January and the first week of February this year. Two percent of the respondents gave no answer. The on-campus sexual activities, the study noted, are usually done in "sex hotspots," particularly in areas hidden from sight by trees and bushes, and are free of use. The hotspots included the densely vegetated Lagoon, the wide-open Sunken Garden, the parking lots and comfort rooms. Even Palma Hall, more popularly known as A.S., and the Main Library are also considered sex hotspots, the study reported. Contrary to belief that UP Diliman students are sexually liberated, the study found out that only a fourth or 24 percent of the respondents have had sex in the three months before the survey. The students' favorite sexual activity was French kissing, with 55 percent of respondents. Petting or necking and self-masturbation were the second favourite with 48 percent, while 34 percent engaged in oral sex. Only 27 percent had coital sex, or "actual" sex involving the genitals, while 7 percent had anal sex. But taking both sexes into account, the top sexual activity among females was French kissing, with nearly half or 49 percent saying they had engaged in it, followed by self- and mutual- masturbation with 18 percent each. Among males, it was self-masturbation on top with 89 percent, followed by French kissing with 68 percent, and petting or necking with 62 percent. Of 126 respondents who have had sex, 40 percent "sometimes" used protection, 36 percent "always" used protection, while 24 percent "never" used protection. Of those who used protection, condoms were the preferred method, with 88 percent saying they had used one. Birth-control pills came in a far second with 10 percent, while rhythm method was done by 6 percent. Respondents to the study were UP Diliman undergraduate students with ages between 16 and 20. Sampling was multi-stage, with respondents picked from 20 colleges. Department chair Violeda Umali said the margin of error was a little below plus or minus 5 percent, because of "spoilage" in the original sample of 387 students. Intriguingly, the respondents also reported engaging in sex through technology: 15 percent have engaged in phone sex; 13 percent in cybersex or Internet sex; and 10 percent in text sex. On the respondents' sexual views, the study reported that more than a third or 34 percent found premarital sex "completely" acceptable, 39 percent consider it "sometimes" acceptable, while 27 percent did not find it acceptable at all. The students' outlook toward homosexuality, the study found, was generally positive, with more than half or 51 percent finding it "completely" acceptable, 26 percent seeing "sometimes" acceptable, and 22 percent saying it was not acceptable at all. The researchers said the study applies only to UP Diliman students. Umali said the study showed an aspect of UP students' sex life that she found "surprising." The wide range of sexual activity that the respondents engaged in, she said, was completely unheard of in her time.
But are they go that far ? Marry someone who they don't like or love ? Sacrifice her whole life like a martyr ? And sacrifice the life of her children if they appear after a marriage ?
Not only Filipinas but girls from many South East Asian countries, it is hard to blame them really when you are their mode to a better life in the West. It is one of the reasons that it is better to go to the Philippines yourself as opposed to online dating. Just think how many chaps the online Filipina has trawled through to get to you. You need a Filipina that is self sufficient and you do not have to spend money on, no money at all. Reverse it in fact, find yourself a girl who can easily adapt to UK life and will be able to find a reasonable job to put more money into your pocket You know it makes sense
And look like Miss World, cook like Nigella Lawson and be under 25 plus be a tampo free lass, looking for her first love and a mensa IQ and can survive on a couple of sets of clothes. Go for it.
Yes it's possible. I guess if she was needing you financially she could/would learn to love you. When I say that I think its possible that she could learn to love you just as genuinely as a girl who doesn't need to rely on you financially, in fact I would guess she could love even more. I think you need to keep an open mind though
