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The Recession is Hurting Everyone

Discussion in 'Humour' started by KeithAngel, May 1, 2011.

  1. KeithAngel
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    KeithAngel 2063 Lifetime Member

    THE RECESSION HITS EVERYBODY

    I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

    Wives are sleeping with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.

    CEO's are now playing miniature golf.

    Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

    I saw a Mormon polygamist with only one wife.

    If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

    McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

    Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.

    Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.

    My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!

    A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.

    A picture is now only worth 200 words.

    When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.

    The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

    Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!


    And, finally...


    I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck
  2. Bigtombowski
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    Bigtombowski Pinaka Gwapo

    That's very funny right there! I'm gonna read that again tomorrow and laugh again, especially about the wives and batteries lolz!
  3. TheTeach
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    TheTeach Le MaƮtre Senior Member

    :like:

    Al.:england:
  4. oss
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    oss Somewhere Staff Member

    ROFL I saw that program too ;) hahahahahaha :D

    That line is priceless Keith :D
  5. Aromulus
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    Aromulus The Don Staff Member

    Thanks for that..............:like:

    It started my day in good style and mood....:like:
  6. Micawber
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    Micawber Renowned Lifetime Member

    I always enjoy funny 'one-liners'. :like:
  7. KeithAngel
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    KeithAngel 2063 Lifetime Member

    or even funny On-Liners lol

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