A tramp goes into a hardware store and asks for a bottle of turps. "I'm sorry, but I'm not going to sell you turps.", said the shopkeeper. "I know your sort - you're just going to drink it" The tramp draws himself up to his full height and says "I may be down on my luck, but I'll have you know that I have pride and dignity, and I actually have a small shed that I live in and I'm doing it up and painting it. How dare you judge me like that!" The shopkeeper is taken aback and humbled, and says "I do apologise, Sir. I feel terrible. Of course you can have a bottle of turps. In fact, please have it with my compliments" and hands a bottle to the tramp. The tramp thanks the shopkeeper, then as he picks up the bottle exclaims "B***ard - you could have given me a cold one!!!!"
??????? Aren't you jumping the gun a bit....???? Mind you, I am trying to talk the mrs into waiting until December before putting the tree up...........
