Circumstances conspire to force a hard decision

When I came to the Philippines in July 2007, I had absolutely no intention of upping sticks again. I'd made a month long recce visit the previous November and had come to the conclusion that the Philippines was where I wanted to be, living in the UK held no further attraction for me. Visits, yes and I've made three over the years, but as a permanent residence, no.

Before meeting Mae, I dated a number of Filipinas but sooner or later it became all-too apparent that their real interest in me lay in my ability to provide them with a visa and a life in the UK. Not where I wanted to be. Mae, however, was completely different. She had spent time abroad and had travelled around the Philippines - neither of which my earlier love interests had done - and she made it very clear to me right at the outset of our relationship that she wanted to continue living in the Philippines and not move abroad. Mae didn't fancy a big wedding, she wanted us to get married quietly; it was, as she argued, "our day". So we married in Hong Kong with two very close friends as witnesses - they'd secretly married a week earlier in a Cebu Judge's Chambers - and had a few day's honeymoon there. A few months later and by which time we'd moved from Cebu to Davao, our first child was born.

Life for us was going swimmingly. We bought a 1,500 square metre plot of land just outside the built-up conurbation and were having a house constructed by Mike, an American expat builder from San Francisco, and his Filipino workforce. And we had first option on a further 4,000 square metres immediately adjoining our land. Unfortunately we discovered to our horror that not only had he'd failed to obtain a building permit but that he was stealing money and materials - and there remains suspicion that much of the timber he used in its construction was illegally logged. Work on the project had to cease immediately. But we remained undaunted and fully intended to have the house finished by a pair of Filipino brothers whose standard workmanship was very high.

But the rot set-in at the end of last year. We were both horrified - and Mae distraught - by the Philippine governments' lack of action following the Bohol earthquake and the super-typhoon that struck a month later. We found it truly sickening to watch TV reports of visits to the affected area being made by the great and the good but hundreds of thousands of Filipinos received little - and those who either didn't vote for the local mayor or Barangay Captain or had some known foreigner connection were denied any aid. That, coupled with concerns about our childrens' education, made Mae uneasy about life here but she kept her thoughts to herself. For possibly the first time in her life, she has seen politicians and government officials for what they really are - corruption and greed writ large before her eyes.

For my part, I was becoming increasingly concerned about the cost of living here. In 2007, I was getting 95 Pesos to the Pound, today the exchange rate is closer to 70 and may well fall again. Just the other day, I was comparing the prices of electricity and gas with my daughter who lives in London and we came to the conclusion that I'm now paying almost five times more per year than she is and that's a situation that's likely to worsen.

But what tipped the balance for us was the news that our younger son has extremely sensitive skin and any exposure to strong sunlight brings him out in painful rashes. Strong sunlight in the Philippines is a given and the doctors can not give us any indication of whether he's likely to grow out of that; a case of wait and see. As the heat can also bring on the rashes, but not quite to the same extent, we've been advised to keep him in an air-conditioned room 24/7.

Over the last few weeks, we've been considering our options and researching other countries to move to. For our son's sake, our options aren't that many, basically somewhere in northern Europe.

We've decided on Poland but we won't be moving there by dint of the EU's freedom of movement laws but rather by virtue of the fact that I'm half-Polish. That decison has been helped, to a certain extent, by correspondence with another forum member, Brock, who's currently living there with Nesa, his wife. They do intend to move to the UK eventually but he tells me that they may well move back to Poland after a spell in the UK. They are living in a fully-furnished and equipped apartment in Bielsko Biala, about 40 km southwest of Krakow and close to the Czech border, and he tells me he pays £200 in rent which includes all services (electricity, water etc). That's somewhat less than I'm paying for an unfurnished place here. Property prices there are highly affordable as is the cost of food and we'd be more than halving our monthly expenditure. Everything except imported electronics is cheaper in Poland than either the UK or the Philippines.

We are both saddened by the inevitability of the situation but at the same time excited by the prospect of a completely new chapter in our lives. Our sons should certainly benefit from an education there: for one thing, they should become truly multi-lingual by being able to communicate in Visayan, English, Polish and be taught German and possibly French or Spanish. That should stand them in good stead.

Indeed, Dom, and I do look forward to that possibility with relish!

Beer wise I never could pronounce Zywiec.

Zee vee yetch

Sorry to hear about your son.
Up until my early teens i had very sensitive skin and missed out on certain things due to my condition. For some reason the condition disappeared completely by my mid teens. Hopefully the same thing will happen with you son.

Interesting update. Shame about PI not being what it once used to be! I have on occasion imagined moving there in later years, as a possibility, not so sure now.

Thank you, Alfie

Mark may well outgrow this condition, who knows? Certainly not the doctors here.

Thanks, Sean, I'm pretty sure it will be. We intend to move by then end of the year, hopefully in time to spend Christmas there

"Hot" is a comparative term, we've been sweltering in temperatures hovering in the very high 30s since mid-February. And no rain to speak of for months which partly accounts for the acute shortage on Mindanao - much of its power generation is hydro-electric and geothermal.

How did you find Poland and was the lack of English (not yours, theirs!) a barrier?

Good luck with the move Markham, many people speak reasonable English in Poland nowadays, the younger generation that is. You will be going from one extreme to the other weather wise as OSS mentioned.
Did you consider the Czech Republic? cheaper there than Poland and as Dom says you can get the Pilsner Urquell and the genuine Budweiser Budvar there. I was working with a Polish guy a few months back and he did nothing but complain about how prices had gone up recently in Poland. Wherever you go I'm sure it will work out, pros and cons and all that.

A lot of people grow out of allergies as mentioned above, lets hope the nipper is one of the lucky ones.

Oh I'm envious of your daughter, Jim. Krakow is a beautiful city and probably the cultural heart of the country.

Thanks Tim

I didn't look to deeply into the Czech Replublic once I had received a lot of positive information about Poland. Who knows what's going to happen in Europe over the next few years and if Britain does leave the EU then we might have a problem with living elsewhere. At least by then I should have my Polish citizenship sorted-out. The only downside I can see is that if Britain does pull-out of the EU, there'll be a lot of returning Poles all looking for work and housing. Maybe my views on that will all change, purely out of self-interest!

I'm surprised your Polish friend was complaining about prices - but both wages and the cost of living in Poland is much lower. Late last week, Brock sent me some prices for food that he'd just bought:

The only thing on his list that is cheaper here are the frozen shrimps but those sold here are completely tasteless. And he's given me the prices for nappies and baby formula which are less than half the price here. His prices are converted into Pesos and I've added the Sterling equivalent.

The Polish chap was moaning mainly about the price of clothes and household electrical items from what I recall. I've always found Poland a pleasant enough place and as you probably know, they work extremely hard, in general anyway. There are a couple of things I don't like there, they eat the main meal of the day at lunchtime, something I found difficult to get used to, and I don't like some of the old towns as they look extremely bleak. Having said that, many places in the old eastern block countries look like that although some of the places are brightening up a little. What I do love about the place is its architecture in some of the better kept towns, I think you'll grow to like it even if it doesn't appeal on your arrival.

You're right about the prices in the Phils, when I've inquired about the cost of utilities and so on there I have always been a little taken a back with the cost.

I always used to gauge a country by the price of the cigarettes and the cost of a pint, you're never far out when you use those two as a general measure . As an example I have paid most for cigarettes and a pint in countries like Norway, Denmark and Sweden, and everything else in those countries is expensive too.

The first time I went to work in the Philippines I could buy nine bottles of SM for the price of one pint of beer in the UK, that was maybe eighteen years ago, I don't know how many you could buy now as I quit drinking a long time ago, but intend to start again when I retire as you need plenty of time to drink properly

Those pictures just about sum up the contrasts there OSS, those photos could have been taken in several countries in Eastern Europe, they all look the same.