Don't worry it's not that easy to apply for visiting visa if he is not relatives. Also not all relatives visiting visa are easy to approve as they do check their savings or money in the bank, if they have business, properties etc. So if she is broke it's highly unlikely for her to sponsor him on a visit visa.
After reading through the posts of yours i feel that this Ex is the reason your G/F is behaving like this. Maybe she just never got over him,..and now after being with you she secretly wants only him. I'm very sorry to hear your situation, I been there too buddy,...terrible feelings,...but you are just masking the pain with a new G/F just now. You speak of how you feel about the Ex getting to be with your kids,....but spare a moments thought for your little kids,...what will they think when they find out that their Daddy has left their mum and got married to someone else ???? Its gonna be a tough roller-coaster ride for you bud, I went through this many years ago when my kids were 4 and 1 . My advise would be to just stay friends with this new G/F for the time being, her special words to you will sooth the pains but won't make the problem go away,...and neither will getting married to her ! Realise that in some relationship breakdowns the guy is NOT to blame !! Jonny
On hindsight,...I haven't read up on your previous posts,....but are you saying that you are not married to the mother of your children ?? How is she still able to live in the UK after having 2 kids but not married ? How can she possibly ask the immigration for her Ex to join her here ?? ( Uk ) just wondering, Jonny
@ Jonnyivy My girl is not just my girlfriend.. she's my fiancee and we are planning to get married soon. I proposed to her on March what made her shocked, speechless and happy She's the girl I was always dreaming of... Once we are married she will apply for eea family permit. Back to the topic. I recorded our conversation (a.k.a argument) and she mentioned his name. Whatmore he lives in Malaysia right now and according to my ex she doesn't know whether he has changed his name on malaysian passport or not. All is recorded on my mobile. Of coarse kids will want to know the truth in the future. They will question not only mother but confront me as well. No, we have never been married. We had a plan but something inside of me told me that I shouldn't do it so I have never proposed to her. All that aggression and violence led me to avoid marriage with her at all costs. She is in the UK since 2004 and never applied for citizenship yet however she past the test for it. She claimed she had no money to continue and take the oath. According to her it is only a visitor's visa.. anyway, thanks a lot for all your advices and I will do everything to stop this man from coming here and continue destroying my kids.
How can I report? I thought o it earlier on as well but I can't find anything on uk border agency website. Thanks a lot..
Perhaps I missed something here, if you and your ex have decided to seperate and move on with your lives, what does it have to do with you whether your ex finds a new man or returns to an old flame of hers??? after all you are now happy and about to be married to a new partner, shouldn't your ex be afforded the same opportunities ??? Your duty is to provide love and support to your kids, what your ex does now should be of no concern to you unless it is dertrimental to the childrens health or well being, yours is not a unique case and like all the rest of us who have been through relationship breakdowns that involve children you must learn to move on with your new partner whilst giving all the support and love that you can to your children...
You say "She is in the UK since 2004 and never applied for citizenship yet however she past the test for it. She claimed she had no money to continue and take the oath." When you said she passed the test for it, that would be the life in UK test and it's not the Citizenship application yet, as she still have to apply for it which will cost her £851. I thought she is your ex wife! but you were never married to her! in that sense you can't stop her what she wants to do in her life. But of course if you are really against this guy coming over, simpy inform the immigration that this guy is not your ex relatives and if you have all the conversation recorded this will be enough proof. On the other hand, as I said before, it is not easy for both of them to get her ex BF simply because the immigration will require enough proof that she can support visitor financially and provide accommodation to her guest and the guest will have to prove to British embassy upon applying for visiting visa that he has enough funds etc. But as other people say, it is better for you to move on! the more you show interest on blocking whatever she do in her life, you are just making her think you care that much so she think, afterall she can still manipulate you emotionally! try to focus with your fiancee' it will make life easier for you! about the kids they will eventually grow up and will never forget you are their father. You worry too much about them! it's very rare to find a mother that will put their children's life in danger there are few of them like my mother!
Yes, I agree with you that I should move on.. If there were no kids I would not be bothered but thinking that another man will take my responsibility, touch them, etc drives me insane.. and me... their father will only have visiting hours.. this is my point.
Yes it certainly does hurt bud ! Maybe in life nowadays there is not so much of the family bond as used to be (Mum, Dad, 2.4 children ). I learned to live what you are describing,...you do learn to live with it bud, whether it be the Ex, a.n.other , it hurts but just make sure you give your kids all the love you can when you see them and not spent most of the time asking what their Mum is doing or de-crying her ! Good luck, Jonny
Another step in destroying our plans to get married.. my ex applied for child support via CSA. That means I am going to pay 20% of my salary which is going to leave me with roughly 150 pounds a month after all bills and loan have been paid. Good my loan wl finish on June... I always have been willing to support my kids, buying them things they need, etc but 20% of my salary covers all their expenses which means tax credit she gets will go for saving account.. I am looking after my kids during night too so how am I going to prove it to CSA if mother might deny it? The good thing is my overtime comes with different payslips so I will not send them these. I will have no choice but to work harder. This is just ridiculous I have to pay her so much, her as a single mother gets huge benefits, still works in agency mainly nights where she gets £11/hour. Is there any way to stop this?
Hi, I feel for you in this relationship. I had similar experience with my first wife who later admitted to using me just to get to UK. She was an absolute nutcase and just wanted conflict rather than any attempt at a solution. I doubt very much if your relationship is recoverable even if either of you wanted to. from what you describe , she just wants out. My advice is (dont know how long youve been married) get divorced asap. For now dont get involved in new relationship. It can only make matters worse. Concentrate on sorting the current situation and then you need time to just catch your breath and find your feet again. Rushing into relationships is never a good idea at the best of times. Find a new love when your life is settled again and your mind is rational. In the mean time you really do need to seek legal advice and maybe even go to the police and report her behaviour but that can be risky as they seem to take the side of the cute little lady and make you out to be the bad guy. Be careful...i think this woman may have ulterior motives . Good Luck. Colin57
pps would be very interesting to moniter her conversations to her friends and contacts. I bet she is trying to set you up!! Some pinays are just downright nutters . Sorry to all good pinays as you truly are the best woman in the world!!
That is very sad! My husband is very lucky! I love him so much and we are now married for almost 18 years! Our relationship is not that perfect we do fight as well mainly because I am insanely jealous but he is patient and never stop loving me that is why I am grateful to have such a loving husband. Some people do ask us how long we've been married and they are surprised we are still together and still very much in love with each other! I am so sorry you encountered a bad Pinay! I wish time will come that faith will favour you! I wish you find the right woman for you!
