Here we go again, hounded out for writing what I have found.. Is it my Fault that western men have caused me the embarrassment constantly when I refer to my wife? I'm sorry you guys take it to heart, really, but I've been members of forums where people literally treat their 'wives' like dirt. 'I'll divorce her and get another' , yep I've seen this. Quite why you folks think I'm targeting you, I don't know, I've already explained I understand exactly how the process works, it's no different to arranged marriages in islam. You feel I've got a holier than tho relationship.. no, we fight all the time.. Like I said, I'm not saying EVERYONE who marries a younger bride is a social misfit, I'm just commenting on the people I personally have met.. The fact I seem to have a massive reaction here, even though I've not been very provocative at all speaks volumes about these individuals and their own opinion of their lives.. like I said, I'm commenting from my own perspective, quite why I'm being called a troll etc.. I don't know. If you are a troll for talking about your experiences then hey .. my hand is up.. Like I said, what are you going to have in common with someone 30 years your junior? I wasn't aware this was a site that basically is an older white guy/ younger filipina sort of place.. and anyone pointing out this gets attacked and made to feel bad
If you hadnt told us how old you are and your age gap we would thought you were just another grumpy old git like the rest of us and equally socially mis fit a position of some worth when I look around the socially fit
Every man I know, including my 21 year old son, has found a way to sidle up to me after first meeting K and has muttered or whispered, "Well done!" / "You did well for yourself there!" / "You are a very lucky man!" or words to that effect. Which proves two things: 1. Male chauvinism is alive and well, and, 2. Clearly, I am a disastrous social misfit, since they are all amazed that I managed to marry a pretty woman.
I've been watching this with amusement. Seems that some of these views are likely to cause offence to some people. It's no one's business what the age difference is or why but the parties concerned. I feel that this is a sensitive matter for people to discuss. Perhaps the title could have been better framed..
Its a topic that is bound to crop up in a Phil/Brit relationship, the thread has amused me too, I almost wish I had a wife half my age so I could join in a bit more
yes .. and maybe I could have been a little better with the way I worded things.. I'm sorry if I came off as someone who 'has it all', in respect that I met my love at work.. rather than over a computer or phone etc.. it's not to say that your love is any less or greater than mine.. As I said, everyone is entitled to happiness, I was merely pointing out certain things which are alive and well in fil culture, as well as western culture.. I also wanted to point out why I came to that conclusion from my own experiences, despite my wife being more senior and earning much more than me.. Sorry folks, I didn't mean to make out that you are 'desperate/sad/socially retarded', obviously not everyone is, but as I said, a large proportion of folks I've met in hotels are.. I'm telling it how I see it, now suddenly I'm a troll and all that gubbins.. I do find it funny the people who have gone straight for me, even though every post has been the truth, some feel it's directed at them obviously.. like I said, look at yourself, why are you rushing to defend yourself? If you are going for a 20 or 30 year younger wife, surely you have to question why? What could you possibly have in common, aside from your passport or bank account? It's a serious question, but unfortunately most on the forums don't want to answer, it's better to harass people who conform to normal age ranges, and make them feel like THEY are the odd ones..
Arranged marriages? I knew a woman who, at the age of 19,was married off by her family to a country schoolmaster, quite a bit older than her, because she had shown interest in a dashing young soldier. Her name was Florence Ellen Stanley, she was my grandmother, and this happened in rural Warwickshire in 1904.
I'm beginning to realise that you couldn't have managed a long-distance relationship, and were lucky to meet your partner at work. Conducting an LDR would entail writing at least on occasion to your loved one, and (I hope it is confined to your writing only) you can't help but come across as offensive. Even when attempting to justify your initial post, you appear to have offended even more of us. I'm beginning to think that might be your intention, hence the troll accusation. It's time for me to press the 'ignore' button I'm afraid Ben old boy. Good Bye and Good Luck with becoming 'normal'.
I'll answer: 1. Politics. We are both social and political liberals. 2. Religion. We are both agnostic. 3. The small boy that we are bringing up. 4. The countryside. 5. Motorcycles 6. Cooking 7. Films 8. A good night out... We disagree about: 1. Gardening (she likes it; I don't...) 2. Sailing (I like it...) 3. Music.
I know, and it's fun, I get dissed for being a normal guy who doesn't have any hangups..(well a few, and they involve waders!) I love my wife for who she is and I celebrate her culture, yet on here I'm made out to be a troll, when all I'm doing is pointing out the obvious and hoping people can actually debate.. it's a massive subject, but many prefer to say I'm a troll and that I shouldn't talk about this.. why? Why is it taboo? Why do people get so het (angry) up about this? Is it that you wouldn't have a hope with a gorgeous young girl in your homeland? Is it that these girls are willing to give their lives for their family? I find it very noble that they do, and yet when the truth is shown like a spotlight on them, they come out all guns blazing.. would be interesting to see all those trying to shoot me down, tell us all how many 'brides' they have had.
Me and my wife have so much in common. So much more than I've had in any other relationship. We enjoy doing the same things, particularly concerts (and, yes, we do enjoy the same music), watching live sports and being a couple of lazy arses, lounging on the sofa and watching box sets or films. Right now we are thoroughly engrossed in The Tudors! I always feel that people who question how people in other relationships can't possibly have much in common only do so because they, themselves, don't have much in common in their own so find it hard to imagine.
See, you're still at it Uncle Ben. Insisting that some people have a certain type of relationship because they can't get a girlfriend in the UK. You want to know why people think you are trolling? Look right there. Surely the same could be said about people who have to find a relationship with a work colleague because they can't find one in their own social life.
Do you actually read back what you write before posting it? No one is saying you shouldn't talk about this, it certainly isn't taboo. Its the way you try to defend yourself and then insult everyone within the same paragraph. For instance Thats like me walking up to a complete stranger who happens to have a wife / girlfriend from outside the UK and not necessarily the Philippines which you seem to think is the only place women marry british men from and saying "alright mate you ugly loser, see you couldn't get a fit english bird your own age. Wrench this one away from her family who's young enough to be your daughter from halfway round the world with the promise of more than a bowl of rice and a couple of quid to send back to the family thats she's been brave enough to leave for obvious monetary gain?" Here's the thing that you don't seem to understand. Regardless of age, race, creed, colour, where or how you met. If you find someone you have a connection with none of those things matter. Its all about the one and its no -one elses business but theirs. For information, though it is none of your business but just to show that what you write offends me in a same age marriage as it offends those with an age difference in their marriage. My wife is 3 months older than I am and she is my first "bride" (why you put that in quotations?). We met out in the Philippines where she was a waitress and I was on a ship. I knew when I was at school that I didn't want a girl from where I am from, I knew I wanted something else.
