Hi All ... some advice needed

Hi everyone.

I'm new to posting here.
Been browsing for a while but it's time to ask others experience.
I have been with my girlfriend since October 2018.
We have spent time together on two occasions, February 2019 and January 2020.
On both occasions I went to the Philippines.
My girlfriend has spent many years years working abroad as an OFW in Singapore (2 years) Cyprus (7 years) and Hong Kong (2 years).
(She worked abroad to put both daughters through university)
She is currently trying to get to Israel for work but having problems due to lock down etc.
I am going through the final stages of divorce and have four kids (after a 22 year marriage the youngest is 12) and my girlfriend has two older daughters (21 and 23) and her marriage has been annuled.
We talk every day on messages and video calls.
Just trying to give some background information here.

My question is how can we be together?.
After talking to others it seems the fiancé visa is the best way forward and my girlfriend could come here for six months and we either get married or she returns home ?.
From what I have read you need to have marriage plans ready from the start to be able to get everything done in time ?.
From what I have heard and read there seems to be no other easy options ?.
I can't go to the Philippines (or Israel if she goes) for more than about 10 days because of work and children commitments.
we have discussed it and she would be happy to come here for a few years, she is used to being away from home.

Any other suggestions or advice ?

Two options if want to get married in UK.

Fiancee visa which can be converted in country to settlement visa.

Marriage visit visa where can get married in UK but has to leave at end of six months and apply for settlement visa in home country. Advantage cheap to get and fairly simple.

If you factor in flight costs of having to return to home country not much difference in costs.

If want simple civil ceremony plenty of time to do in six months although may be backlog after lockdown.

Process is email registrar to get info on how to do it. Get told that both have to be in country for seven days to give notice. Use that as part of visa evidence trail on both routes. On arrival in UK make appointment to give notice after seven days. Get appointment and make ceremony booking. Have to wait at least 28 days before ceremony and longer if home office object although with either of routes above should only be 28 days.

On marriage visa we arrived middle of March and got married middle of June. So long as flexible on dates would expect you to be ok although lockdown may complicate things.

Thanks for the information.

It's a hard decision for me to introduce kids to my girlfriend and announce that we will be married that quickly.
I guess our only option (and I'm guessing most of us are in this situation) is to make that decision beforehand and plan around it.
From what I have heard visit visas / tourist visas are not an easy option.

I'm 54 so it makes sense to wait until next year when I have pension money available to put myself in a better financial position.

Thanks again.


Paul

the fact that she has got an anullment means the most difficult waste of time and money is out of the way. she just needs to apply for a fiancee visa--and take it from there.

Ok thanks,
yeah thankfully this is already done so one less thing to worry about.

I must confess that one reason for marrying in the Phils was to save the cost of one visa. The saving almost paid for the wedding!
To be fair, I did want to marriage to take place in front of my ladies family.
If that option is open to you, it would mean two trips. One to show you are free to marry and obtain the marriage licence and a second for the wedding.
The licence is not released for ten working days and like you I am restricted to ten days holiday at a time.
Good luck with your plans, keep us updated.

Agree with what's been written by @uklove and @Br28016 can't add more other than...
Do your kids live with you?
Do the kids know about " this nice lady in a far away land?"
Do the kids know youve holidayed together?
Ask them what they think ( I did when I embarked on our journey) you maybe pleasantlysurprised at their answers and advice.
Good Luck

Hi thanks for this.

So you were married in the Phils and your partner applied for a settlement visa from there ?.
This could be a future option for me because I have my kids and only two sisters here in the UK, so not too much family.

Hi and thanks.

Yes they know my girlfriend and are obviously interested and curious.
They have seen pictures and videos and also said hello over video calls.
I also sent them pictures whilst we were together in the Philippines.
She also bought them some gifts from Hong Kong while she was there.
My youngest son stays with me three times a week and the others come for dinner once a week.
I think you are right that I should definitely talk to the kids and ask their opinions before I make any plans.

I agree with your approach with caution advice.
My girlfriend knows a certain amount about my finances ... Probably more than you would be comfortable with.
We have never discussed getting married but I think we both know this is the only option for us to be able to be together.
We have all read the horror stories some guys have faced so it's something we all need to be mindful of.
Unfortunately we are all in the situation where a leap of faith is needed at some point.
I need to take advice because I also feel that whatever happens I don't want to abandon my kids financially when I'm gone in the future.
This would be true in any relationship.
I think some legal advice is needed anyone have any insights on wills or prenuptial agreements ?.

If it suits you it's a good option, our wedding certainly was 'different' and it gave us the chance to involve my wife's family which was a big plus especially as they were soon going to say goodbye to her.
We had a convoy of tricycles as that is the most commonly used mode of transport in her town.
The flowers....Rose's for her bouquet, orchids for buttonholes, baskets of flowers everywhere, a bouquet for my mother-in-law and massive bunches of flowers on the two leading tricycles....all for £80!

I can't comment on the application process for a finance visa but my other half needed an IELTs test, a TB test and had to attend the CFO seminar. Beware of twists like the CFO certificate (which you can't fly without) will only be issued after the Visa is granted.
At the time we had to provide hard copies of the documentation and I hand delivered them because it gave me an excuse to see her again.
Others on here will be able to advise you further but I think now you upload them.

Of course a Filipino judge will arrange a prenuptial at short notice....at an elevated price!

It was hard getting married and not being with her so there are a lot of pluses and minuses to consider.

I got married in the Philippines back in 2015 and it's great fun also really nice for the lady to get married in front of her family.
You may not be able, because your wife is a divorcee to get married in church get your GF to ask locally!
Simple steps and it's tight to do it in 14 days
Arrange flight to get you to Manila either late at night or early morning.
Have appointment booked in British Embassy for the morning you land (give yourself enough time from arrival to appointment.
You will swear an oath stating you are free to marry you will supply an affidavit (printable off internet UKGOV site) and then be given a bit of paper stating your free to marry to give to the local civic office
Day 2 you will of already made arrangements at the local civic office to hand in your authorised to marry document (can't remember correct title of doc)
Day 3 to 12 (10 days posting of banns in local office) day 13 marry.
Unfortunately depending on the length of your holiday you will have to be parted.
You will then make an application electronically called a spouse visa all documents are scanned and uploaded either in the Philippines or UK or .
As part of application process your wife will need to pass at approved centres a basic English language test and a TB screening documents from these will support your application. She will have her biometrics done
The application process can be detailed later.
You will wait about 6 to 12 weeks on average depending on how straightforward the application is.

Of course a Filipino judge will arrange a prenuptial at short notice....at an elevated price!

what else would you expect ? the country has the best legal system money can buy.

Yes lots to consider and thank you for your input.
My girlfriend has worked abroad in a number of countries as I have said previously so she is certainly used to all the hoops she needs to jump through... Medicals, seminars, certificates etc !.

I'm curious, as a couple that are now on the other side of this, what are the biggest challenges you face with your partner being so far from home ?.
I guess there is a cost of returning regularly, once per year ?.
How is she finding life in the UK ?..
Cold I'm guessing ? )

my wife prefers living in the UK for various reasons--but mainly because she earns 10 times the money she could back home. she was due to go home this month !

My wife loves the seasons and the way of life.
She has been here nearly 5 years and we have been back there 4 times in that period
Depending on time of year you can pick up some good flight prices avoid the lead up to Christmas very expensive

Yes that's most definitely the biggest draw for the Overseas Filipino Workers too.
The plus side for us is apart from flights (and mine was expensive in January) the cost to stay and eat there is very cheap !

I am sure that all nationalities have corruption, I am sure the Philippines is trying to eradicate all wrong doings