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Beginers Guide to Driving in the Philippines

Discussion in 'Life in the Philippines' started by Micawber, Feb 3, 2016.

  1. Micawber
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    Micawber Renowned Lifetime Member

    Dear Fellow Driver:

    Thank you for taking the time to study the beginner’s guide to driving in the Philippines. This handbook will help you survive driving in the Philippines and will make sure you cause as much traffic and inconvenience as you can on your journey to becoming a certified Pinoy driver.

    Everything in this handbook will be based on two principles. Learn them well and commit them to heart.

    The first rule of driving in the Philippines is: You are more important than other people on the road.

    The second rule of driving in the Philippines is: There are no rules.

    Ready? Step on the gas, pull out without looking, and let’s begin.

    Right-Of-Way Courtesy and common sense dictates respecting the right-of-way of others, vehicles and pedestrians alike. However, you are driving in the Philippines. Remember our first rule? Nobody is more important than you. Here, whoever yields loses. So go ahead and block everybody!

    If you see a pedestrian crossing the road, honk your horn and speed up. You’re the big shot in a car. Block them peasants!

    If another vehicle wants to merge in your lane and there’s enough space in front of you, flash your headlights, speed up, and block them. Your lane is your territory. Guard it with your life.

    Is the car in front of you driving at the recommended speed limit? Or maybe you have the itch to be just one car ahead to prove your superiority despite achieving nothing? The solution is to drive in the opposite lane, known colloquially as counterflowing. Simply pull out, cross the center line, and drive in the same lane as oncoming traffic. Once you have passed the car in front of you, swerve back without signaling so they can’t block you off. You can’t call yourself a true blue Philippine driver if you haven’t mastered this trick!

    Intersections and U-Turns
    If you see a line of cars about to make a U-turn or turn at an intersection, feel free to drive outside of their lane and cut them off in front. Do not wait in line; that’s only for civilized drivers. This way, you get ahead of everybody else who have been patiently waiting for their turn in traffic.

    Traffic lights
    Green means go. Yellow means go faster before it goes red. Red means stop — but only if there are other cars crossing the intersection. Otherwise, feel free to ignore it and just go straight ahead.

    If you find yourself at a red light and you’re the car in front, an effective way of making your 30-second to 1-minute wait bearable is to slowly inch your car forward bit by bit. By the time the light turns green, you’ll already be halfway through the intersection.

    Stopping and Parking
    Speaking of doing whatever you want, did you know that the Philippines is the only country where you can stop anywhere you want, anytime you want? It doesn’t matter if it’s the middle of a busy street, a sidewalk, or a pedestrian crosswalk, if you want to show everyone how important you are, simply turn on your hazard lights and stop. Not only will this cause inconvenience and unnecessary traffic stoppage, the cars behind you will race to go around your vehicle causing even more hassle for others! Good job!

    Traffic skills
    Apart from counterflowing, an effective way to avoid traffic caused by irresponsible drivers like you is to create your own lane. You see those broken lines in the road? No, they’re not there to demarcate lanes. They’re there to guide you in creating your own lane in case of a traffic jam. Align the center of your car with the broken lines, drive, and watch cars on either side of you move out of the way in order to accommodate your royal douchiness. This maneuver is also known as “The Parting Of The Red Sea.”

    In most other countries, changing lanes is always preceded by the use of your turn signal. This tells other drivers that you intend to go to the left or right. In the Philippines, you do not want to use your signal lights when turning or changing lanes. Doing so will prompt the car on the side where you intend to turn to speed up and block you even though they were driving at normal speed before you indicated.

    There you have it. Everything you need to manage the mean streets of the Philippines. If you follow the rules outlined in this handbook, you will blend in well with the rest of the cavemen on the road and contribute to the soul-sucking traffic that plagues this great nation.

    Source
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  2. oss
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    oss Somewhere Staff Member

    :D not far from the truth.

    Saying that I had the most terrifying taxi ride I have ever had the other night and that was in the UK.

    Now you all know me, I don't raise issues of immigration I'm not one to be bothered about foreigners coming to work here please bear that in mind.

    This chap was not born in the UK, he went round corners by jerking the steering wheel when it was almost too late, a gentle corner was corrected by drifting 50% over the wrong lane and then jerking the car back to the correct lane. He missed the turnoff for my block so he pulls into the middle of the road and starts reversing, not sure if he looked at all before he reversed. Speed was excessive all the time.

    I would swear this guy had never passed a driving test and yet he was working for our well known local private hire taxi company.

    I am about to complain about this guy as I have a couple of friends that work for the same company and I got the colour of the car and a decent chunk of the registration number.

    Terrifying.
  3. KeithAngel
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    KeithAngel 2063 Lifetime Member

    Perhaps he learnt in the Fils and is on his 12 months you wimp Oss :):rolleyes:
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  4. oss
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    oss Somewhere Staff Member

    Well he certainly wasn't Filipino :) but I did wonder if people could work on a foreign driving licence after they arrive here?
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  5. bigmac
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    bigmac Well-Known Member Trusted Member

    driving licence---arent they an optional extra?

    my ex wife--after she had long left me---fessed up she didnt have one--even though driving my cars for a couple of years. then--she admitted she had never had one--never even took a test. but

    she had been driving 30 years !!
  6. Anon04576
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    Anon04576 Well-Known Member

    The probability of being pulled over is quite small assuming you're driving is ok and the car is insured/taxed with no obvious defects.. Ive never been pulled over in a car. Got pulled over on my motorbike loads of times, the exuberance of youth as it once was :rolleyes:
  7. Aromulus
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    Aromulus The Don Staff Member

    People can drive for 12 months before having to sit tests for a full british licence.
    Owners of foreign licences are not allowed to drive for gain, as far as I know.
  8. Dave_E
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    Dave_E Well-Known Member Trusted Member

    Never driven in the Philippines myself, but:
    1. Hotel taxi/pickup car got pulled over in Manila, supposed paperwork problem. Police unscrewed number plates and walked away with them till I paid, police refused to talk to me, but driver had no money.
    2. Local van driver stopped on empty road near airport in Tacloban, idiot policeman with a silly self important hat stepped out in front of the van and demanded the driver pay an insignificant sum, not my problem.
  9. oss
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    oss Somewhere Staff Member

    I'd have paid the driver jumped out and got another taxi, ok it was a hotel pickup and should have been a good modern car and you would be taking your chances getting another one, but that just sounds like a stitch up, police and driver both in on it.
  10. subseastu
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    subseastu I'm Bruce Wayne Lifetime Member

    Very funny and not that far from the truth. I could never sleep in the taxi from Manila to Olongapo as I had to keep an eye on our driver. Several times he nodded off at the wheel!
  11. subseastu
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    subseastu I'm Bruce Wayne Lifetime Member

    Open boot, get luggage, walk away, find metered taxi. Failing that make sure you're reimbursed back at the hotel.
  12. Anon04576
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    Anon04576 Well-Known Member

    Ah sorry Dave i was referring to the UK regards being pulled over :)
  13. Dave_E
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    Dave_E Well-Known Member Trusted Member

    Politics. [​IMG]
  14. Markham
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    Markham Guest

    That's a well-known scam that used to be practiced near the airport. Traffic enforcers would stop taxis and if the passenger was a foreigner or looked rich, the enforcer would make-up some offence and threaten to - or actually would - remove the licence plates. The driver would plead poverty - "you are my first passenger, sir" - and needing to get to the airport, the passenger would be coerced into paying.

    I'm not sure if this scam is still in use; it may be, so watch out!
  15. Bootsonground
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    Bootsonground Guest

    We took a tenant to Batangas seaport once..Bastards took our plates..Colorum,they said..3 months and 5K to get them back.
    My BIL has a van that he drives Colurum but he has a fixer now in the LTO.. 250.00 Peso lang.
  16. oss
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    oss Somewhere Staff Member

    Using a private vehicle for business or profit?

    What made them figure that you weren't just carrying a friend?
  17. Bootsonground
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    Bootsonground Guest


    We were just giving them a lift as a courtesy.. Anyway as we entered Batangas pier entrance some guy on the gate asked my BIL for 50.00 Peso for parking fee.. He gave him the cash and asked for a receipt...Obviously the wrong thing to say and If looks could kill..
    Anyway as we were having a snack and a drink they were busy unscrewing our plates.. Colurum daw.
  18. Kevin's McLean
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    Kevin's McLean New Member

    Haha, brilliant beginners guide.
    Might add a third rule though.
    When driving in tbe dark, correct use of headlights is optional.
    I was being driven from Davao to Digos City late one evening and the amount of vehicles on the road with either no headlights on, or full beam on constantly was amazing!!
    I take it that in order for a person from the UK to drive over here, as well as having a large pair of cojones, the AA international driving permit is all that is required? Insurance too I would presume.
    Does anyone know of any scams over in the Philippines where a local, seeing that a vehicle is being driven by a westerner, would either step out in front of or get involved in a collision in the hope of extorting money?
  19. Bootsonground
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    Bootsonground Guest

    When they flash their head lights at you it does`nt mean they intend to give way to you..
    It means get the #@** out of the way...Im coming through.
    Most important rule is if they have an accident with a foreigner it is always the Kano`s fault and he should pay..So if you hit something...Run!!
  20. Methersgate
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    Methersgate Well-Known Member Lifetime Member

    Yes, insurance, international driving licence, and a stiff helping of courage.

    Yes, there are indeed such scams and they are very common.

    I was driving from Manila to Subic via San Fernando some years ago on the old road (very different now!) and we were "in the middle of nowhere", in the lahar affected belt, when I noticed that we were closing the car ahead of us much faster than we should have been doing. I am not a slow driver, as Markham may confirm, but this was odd, as the chap didn't seem to be braking, Was he stopped? Broken down? Even so he was getting too close too fast. I stopped - and a jeepney shot past on our port side - he had RED HEADLIGHTS!
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2016
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